EPISODE 9/20/02
Simon Takes A Job

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September, 2002


FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 20, 2002

Scene 1:
Location: Frasier Cottage
Scene: Inside

SIMON FRASIER, KATIE FRASIER, BONNIE MCKECHNIE, PAUL RYAN

>> Simon: You guys been out drinking, huh? You know, two-for-one specials at Java Underground? I can smell it.
>> Paul: No, Simon. We need you to do something, and technically, it's breaking the law.
>> Bonnie: But it's for a really good cause and that makes a difference, doesn't it?
>> Katie: Simon? Who's at the door?
>> Simon: No one, honey, it's all right. Just go back to bed. Back to bed. She just got out of the hospital. Liver donation. Ring a bell?
>> Paul: How is she?
>> Simon: She's doing good but she's needs some rest right now.
>> Bonnie: Well, if I know Katie like I think I know Katie, nothing's going to hold her down for long.
>> Katie: You've got that right.
>> Simon: Katie! What are you doing?
>> Katie: I'm sorry I'm just bored. Hey, Paul, look at you. You look great.
>> Paul: So do you. It's good to see you.
>> Simon: I was just telling these guys how much you needed you're rest. And they are about to leave, right?
>> Katie: Oh, don't be ridiculous, they just got here. And I need some company. Come on, aren't you going to invite them in?

Scene 2:
Location: Frasier Cottage
Scene: Inside

SIMON FRASIER, KATIE FRASIER, BONNIE MCKECHNIE, PAUL RYAN

>> Simon: I don't think this is a social call, right guys?
>> Paul: Well actually, we were just asking Simon to do some detective work for us.
>> Bonnie: We pay top dollar and you'll be doing this entire town a huge service.
>> Simon: And I haven't said yes, yet, by the way.
>> Katie: So what's the job? Anything is better than selling insurance, right?
>> Bonnie: Look, I know you've been out of town and out of the loop for a while, but have you heard about Marshall Travers?
>> Katie: Sounds familiar.
>> Bonnie: Yeah, well he's running against my mother for D.A.
>> Paul: We have reason to believe that he's connected to Stenbeck.
>> Katie: Eww, major bad news.
>> Paul: But we need proof.
>> Katie: So, how are you going to get that?
>> Bonnie: We want to do some surveillance. You know, wire Marshall for sound.
>> Simon: So, why don't you go to the cops?
>> Paul: We did. Jack said we'd need a court order, probable cause, and things like that take time. We have less than a week to make this thing happen.
>> Simon: And why is Travers running for office here in Oakdale?
>> Paul: I think my father wants to put him in position as D.A. To make sure the charges against him are dropped.
>> Bonnie: And charges against James Stenbeck will never be dropped so long as my mother stays on as D.A.
>> Paul: So we need to prove and publicize this man's connected to my father.
>> Simon: All right. Look, I'm going to tell you, electronic surveillance is not really my strong point. And I'm not so crazy about being the guy that everyone turns to in this town when they need something illegal done.
>> Bonnie: Does it matter that it's illegal, if it's for the right reason, Simon?
>> Simon: You're asking me to do something that the cops turned down. That they won't touch! And Katie just got out of the hospital, she's recovering from a major operation. I'm sorry, all right. You know, I would really like to help --
>> Paul: Bonnie! You know what, Simon? We understand. We will just have to look elsewhere. Bonnie let's go.
>> Simon: Good.
>> Katie: No, no, no, hold it right there. Don't go anywhere until Simon and I have a minute to talk about this.

Scene 3:
Location: Frasier Cottage
Scene: Inside

SIMON FRASIER, KATIE FRASIER, BONNIE MCKECHNIE, PAUL RYAN

>> Simon: Honey, what are you doing?
>> Katie: Didn't I just finish telling you that I never want you to stop being you?
>> Simon: And apparently they're asking me to do something illegal. I thought you didn't want me to do it.
>> Katie: Oh, please? It's not like they're asking you to be pimp daddy to their stable of hookers. You just have to record a few conversations for the good of the community. He wouldn't have to leave the country, would he?
>> Bonnie: A totally local job. He won't have to go farther than the Lakeview Towers Hotel. I promise.
>> Paul: Simon, look, man, nobody's trying to force you into anything you don't wanna do. If you're having doubts about this, that's fine, but maybe you could just steer us in the direction of someone who could help us out.
>> Simon: Good idea. That's a great idea. Don't you think.
>> Katie: I don't think that's a very good idea. He'll take it. Face it, sweetie. I know you love me, but if you're here 24 hours a day playing nursemaid to me, day in day out, eventually you're gonna go buy a gun.
>> Simon: Ha, that's not funny!
>> Katie: Know what else isn't funny? Divorce. You're gonna get so sick of me -- "Simon, do this. Simon, do that."
>> Simon: All right, so -- fine, I'll buy earplugs! You need someone to be here with you.
>> Katie: But it doesn't have to be you -- all the time. Come on, help them, Simon. You're helping the community and think of it as preventive couples therapy. Come on, do it for me. Do it for us. And them -- and everyone. Please?
>> Simon: Fine. Great. When do we start?

Scene 4:
Location: Frasier Cottage
Scene: Inside

SIMON FRASIER, KATIE FRASIER, BONNIE MCKECHNIE, PAUL RYAN

>> Paul: All right. Now this is the basic layout of travers' room. We need to know who he's dealing with, who comes to his room after hours.
>> Bonnie: Who sneaks upstairs in the service elevator --
>> Paul: Who he calls, the names of anybody that he's working with or for --
>> Simon: All right, so we're gonna have to bug the entire room, not just the phone.
>> Paul: Okay.
>> Simon: And we're gonna need a nearby hotel room so we can pick up what the mic is saying.
>> Paul: All right.
>> Bonnie: But Simon, when you said surveillance electronics wasn't your strong point, does that mean you're gonna have to hire someone?
>> Simon: Yeah. I've got someone in mind. It's covered.
>> Katie: Who is it?
>> Simon: Paul, why don't you go to the Lakeview, rent out a suite right near Travers so we can watch who is coming and going.
>> Paul: All right. I'm on it. Simon -- thanks, man.
>> Simon: No problem.
>> Bonnie: Yes, Simon, you are definitely doing the right thing.

Scene 5:
Location: Frasier Cottage
Scene: Inside

SIMON FRASIER, KATIE FRASIER, PAUL RYAN, BONNIE MCKECHNIE

>> Paul: Take good care of yourself.
>> Katie: Bye. Oh, take good care of my husband!
>> Bonnie: We will. Good night!
>> Paul: All right, Simon. Thanks again.
>> Simon: Farewell, good night. So the company's gone.
>> Katie: Mm-hmm.
>> Simon: You've had your little bit of distraction. Now it's off to bed with you right now, young lady. Come on.
>> Katie: Please, no. Well, at least not until you tell me who you're gonna get to help with Travers' room.
>> Simon: Sleep! You're gonna go and get some sleep if I have to drag you there kicking and screaming.
>> Katie: Why can't you tell me who your accomplice is?
>> Simon: Because you are trying to weasel your way into this investigation. It's not gonna happen.
>> Katie: Oh.
>> Simon: Ha ha, yeah. See, I know you. >> Katie: You know I'm not gonna sleep unless you tell me who it is!
>> Simon: You are going to take a nap if I have to tie you to the bedposts.
>> Katie: Ooooh! Now you're talking!
>> Simon: Yeah.
>> Katie: No, no, no, no! No, no, no, no!
>> Simon: Careful.
>> Katie: I wanna stay down here, please!
>> Simon: You are going to bed!
>> Katie: Tell me who it is! Just tell me who it is.
>> Simon: Shh!

Scene: 6
Locations: World Wide Offices/ Frasier Cottage
Scenes: Lucinda Walsh's Office/ Inside

SIMON FRASIER, LUCINDA WALSH, HENRY COLEMAN

>> Lucinda: After you've finished with the boxes, you can carry them down to the mailroom. Okay?
[ Cell phone rings ] yeah?
>> Simon: Lucinda, hi. It's Simon.
>> Lucinda: Oh, hello, Simon darling. How is that brave little wife of yours?
>> Simon: Well, she's sleeping at last.
>> Lucinda: Good. Then she won't hear me telling you how very -- how very unhappy with you I am.
>> Simon: What have I done?
>> Lucinda: It's what you have not done. It seems to me that I let you borrow Henry because you -- I thought -- could instill a modicum of a work ethic in him.
>> Simon: That bad, huh?
>> Lucinda: Worse.
>> Simon: Well, I'll tell you what. How about I take him off your hands for a little bit?
>> Lucinda: You want to borrow him? Again? Whatever for?
>> Simon: Well, it seems I've got a job that's absolutely perfect for Henry -- tailor-made for him and his skills. That's if it's all right with you. >> Lucinda: Uh -- oh, I don't know. No -- I don't know -- I mean, there's so much to be done around here. I don't know if I can -- [ Lucinda laughing ] sure, he's all yours. Well, it seems you have impressed Simon with your decorating skills to the extent that he has to have you again.
>> Henry: Bless you, Ms. Walsh! God bless you. You won't regret this! I promise.
>> Lucinda: Please, don't make me regret.
>> Henry: I'll see you later. Much later!

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September, 2002