EPISODE 10/02/06
Simon Helps Carly

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October, 2006


MONDAY, OCTOBER 02, 2006

Scene 1:
Location: Oakdale
Scene: Apartment Building

SIMON FRASIER, CARLY SNYDER

>> Carly: We should wait.
>> Simon: For?
>> Carly: We're not done.
>> Simon: With?
>> Carly: The apartment. This apartment. Simon, we had a deal. No conjugating until it's finished.
>> Simon: Carly, Carly have you looked around this place? There is nothing left to do.
>> Carly: We haven't sold it yet.
>> Simon: But we will, okay? From the looks of that storm, right this very minute, roofs are leaking, basements are flooding. Young urbanites are going to have to flee their dwelling and come running to us with checkbooks in hand.
>> Carly: But sleeping together, Simon? Here and now, it's just a bad idea.
>> Simon: Okay, there is no work left to do, no tv to distract us, no one else around. What is stopping us from making the most of this?
>> Carly: You still have a thing for Katie. I'm still in love with Jack.
>> Simon: All right, so let's drink to our exes, wherever they are.
>> Carly: And what's the point of that, exactly?
>> Simon: The thing is, Carly, you can't exorcise a demon until you admit to them first. So, here's to Katie and Jack. And with the help of great sex, vanishing from our lives forever.


Scene 2:
Location: Oakdale
Scene: Apartment Building

SIMON FRASIER, CARLY SNYDER

>> Carly: Aren't you hungry? Boy, I sure am. You know, we ought to eat some of this before it spoils.
>> Simon: Okay. Eat.
>> Carly: You're not going to have anything?
>> Simon: No, thank you. Thank you.
>> Carly: Okay. What are you doing?
>> Simon: Thinking about you.
>> Carly: Knock yourself out then. Okay, come on, tell me what is it you're thinking?
>> Simon: I was just thinking about that dress you wore to the Lakeview when you met me that day. I bet you designed it.
>> Carly: I bet you don't even remember what color it was.
>> Simon: It was green-ish.
>> Carly: Lucky guess.
>> Simon: I bet that dress was probably hanging in that closet for a very long time. Untouched, unnoticed, in a garment bag.
>> Carly: I'm a designer. I know how to take care of my clothing.
>> Simon: And there it was in that closet, just hanging there. Carefully preserved, hanging there, waiting to be invited to a party that never happened.
>> Carly: Until you saved it from its dull existence. Simon, I have to wait. You know why.
>> Simon: Right. Superstition. Yeah, you're afraid that if something happens between us before we sell this place, something will go horribly wrong.
>> Carly: I need this sale. I need this money. I need this showcase.
>> Simon: Here's the thing, Carly. There's something you don't know about me -- I'm very superstitious, too. I've got this feeling, this awful feeling, if you don't ...
( CBS News interruption ) [ Electrical tower crashes through building ]
>> Simon: Carly? I guess we're gonna have to paint again. Carly? Carly, can you hear me? Carly?


Scene 3:
Location: Oakdale
Scene: Apartment Building

SIMON FRASIER, CARLY SNYDER

>> Simon: Carly? Carly? Okay. Carly, give me your hand. Carly, give me your hand. Come on Carly, don't die on me! Give me your hand. Can you hear me?
>> Simon: Come on!
>> Carly: Simon --
>> Simon: Carly, thank god you're breathing! >> Carly: If you don't get me out of here and that electrical tower keeps sparking like that, I won't be breathing for much longer. I'll be toast.
>> Simon: All right. Now listen, can you move your legs?
>> Carly: No.
>> Simon: All right. Just leave your hand there.
>> Carly: Don't leave me!
>> Simon: Would I do that?
>> Carly: You kind of tended to look out for number one.
>> Simon: Well Carly, I still am. You see, if I save your life, then you'll feel indebted to me, and then you may sleep with me. And if I don't save you then you'll die, and then what use are you to me then?
>> Carly: Simon, I can't feel my legs.
>> Simon: Well, I can see your toes moving. They are tapping to beat of the band.
>> Carly: Really?
>> Simon: Yeah, let's find a way to get this thing off of you. All right, listen, listen. I'm going to put this under here, and then I'm gonna lift this off of you, okay? I'm gonna lift this off of you, and when I do, on the count of three, you'll roll toward me. Can you handle that?
>> Carly: Yes, will you hurry up?
>> Simon: Ready? Three! Come here. Careful. Are you all right? You okay?
>> Carly: You lied to me, didn't you?
>> Simon: Which time?
>> Carly: About seeing my toes.
>> Simon: Well, I can see them now. And they are all manicured and lovely. How about your legs?
>> Carly: Okay, I think.
>> Simon: All right, do you want to test them out?
>> Carly: Yeah.
>> Simon: Come on. You all right?
>> Carly: No. It's gone. The side of the whole place is gone. How could this happen? This building should have withstood a storm like that.
>> Simon: Carly, the building's fine. It's the electrical tower that crashed through the wall that's a problem.
>> Carly: That's not what caused this.
>> Simon: Have you noticed the sparks flying off exhibit a?
>> Carly: You caused it, Simon! You!


Scene 4:
Location: Oakdale
Scene: Apartment Building

SIMON FRASIER, CARLY SNYDER

>> Carly: If you hadn't cut corners with the construction. If you had done everything that Mike told you to do. He told you there were flaws with this building. You should've fixed them.
>> Simon: Carly, you know what? Check out that electrical tower. Now that would have crashed through any building with precisely the same result. It was an act of God -- unpreventable.
>> Carly: Well, I could have prevented it, all right. If I had stuck to my guns. Not let you get me all hot and bothered --
>> Simon: Then you would have been lying exactly where that tower is right now.
>> Carly: Thank you.
>> Simon: You're welcome.
>> Carly: How do we get out of here?
>> Simon: We don't. Not until someone comes and digs us out. Look at that thing covering the door.
>> Carly: So what do we do?
>> Simon: Talk about your acts of God. Get royally drunk?

Home
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October, 2006