EPISODE 5/9/00
Simon Locks Lily In The Closet


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May, 2000



TUESDAY, MAY 9, 2000


Scene 1:
Place: Atlantic City, New Jersey
Location: Boardwalk Plaza Hotel
Scene: Show room.

LILY WALSH SNYDER, SIMON FRASIER, AND ROSE D'ANGELO (ON STAGE).

>> Simon: So this is what you've been hiding? A low brow twin in the family closet.
>> Lily: Rose is a good person.
>> Simon: Yeah, I'm sure she is. She is a dead ringer for you. Who is she? How on earth did you find her?
>> Lily: Stay away from rose! She's off limits! Do you understand?

Scene 2:
Location: Boardwalk Plaza Hotel
Scene: Show room.

LILY WALSH SNYDER, SIMON FRASIER, AND ROSE D'ANGELO (ON STAGE).

>> Simon: Oh, it's still a free country, this great land of yours.
>> Lily: Rose doesn't know anything. She's a simple person. She loves being a show girl.
>> Simon: It is truly remarkable.
>> Lily: Forget you ever saw her, please.
>> Simon: Lily, that is impossible.
>> Lily: She doesn't know anything about what you're after.
>> Simon: Look lily, beloved, you, and now Rose share the same face. I mean, that is a connection that cannot be ignored.
>> Lily: I have checked it out thoroughly. It's a bizarre coincidence. A trick of nature.
>> Simon: I've come up empty on your side of the gene pool, haven't I? Perhaps I've been barking up the wrong girl. Maybe Rosie is my link to beloved.
>> Lily: She doesn't know anything about beloved.
>> Simon: Thanks for the lead, Lily. Why don't you run along back to Oakdale and live happily every after.
>> Lily: So you can lie and cheat your way into Rose's life the same way you conned yourself into mine? No way. You try and come within 20 feet of Rose, you have to go through me first.

Scene 3:
Scene: Show room.

LILY WALSH SNYDER, SIMON FRASIER, AND ROSE D'ANGELO (ON STAGE).

[Applause.]
>> Simon: Lily, why are you still here? This is none of your concern.
>> Lily: You have been my shadow for ages. The least I can do is return the favor.
>> Simon: You don't know who you're dealing with.
>> Lily: I'm not afraid of you, simon.
>> Simon: I'm not referring to me.
>> Lily: Oh, yes. How could I forget the mysterious stranger, the spy without a name, the bogeyman outside my door?
>> Simon: Just go home. Okay, Lily? Where it's safe.
>> Lily: So you could have a clear shot at Rose? Absolutely not.
>> Simon: Look, Lily, Rose is in very good hands.
>> Lily: If you go after her, I'll be right there to tell her what a lying con artist you are.
>> Simon: Lily, I'm hurt.
>> Lily: And how homes ignite and how trouble follows you everywhere you go.
>> Simon: How did we get to this ugly place?
>> Lily: Let me count the lies.
>> Simon: Look, I am truly sorry. Okay? We started out as friends.
>> Lily: We started out by you setting me up to find those letters by the pond.
>> Simon: That was before I knew I could trust you.
>> Lily: Trust me -- Simon, you do not trust me any more than I trust you. Why don't you just come clean? Tell me why you came to Oakdale, tell me what you want from me, tell me what you want from Rose. Let's just lay it out, and I will decide whether it's true or not.
>> Simon: Fair enough.
>> Lily: Why are you being so agreeable?
>> Simon: Well, no answers, no Rose.
>> Lily: That's right.
>> Simon: Okay. Well, let's go back up to your room, and I promise, I will tell you everything.

Scene 4:
Location: Boardwalk Plaza Hotel
Scene: Lily Walsh Snyder's hotel room.

LILY WALSH SNYDER AND SIMON FRASIER

[Lily enters the hotel room with Simon. She runs over to the phone to answer it.]

[Phone rings.]
>> Lily: Hello?

LILY WALSH SNYDER AND SIMON FRASIER - CONVERSATION

>> Lily: Hung up.
>> Simon: You know, I cannot look at you now without seeing double. How did you find Rose?
>> Lily: I put a picture of beloved over the internet. Rose e-mailed me and told me that she had the same picture.
>> Simon: So, are you related?
>> Lily: Not that we know of.
>> Simon: Come on. There has to be some kind of connection.
>> Lily: You know, you're the one that's supposed to be answering questions.
>> Simon: Okay. Fire away.
>> Lily: Okay, all right. Why did you come to Oakdale? What did you want from me?
>> Simon: It no longer matters.
>> Lily: Then what do you want from Rose?
>> Simon: Why are you being so protective of a complete stranger?
>> Lily: A stranger with my face.
>> Simon: But you just claimed that you're not related.
>> Lily: You just said that there has to be a connection. We just haven't figured out what it is yet.
>> Simon: Don't stress about it, Lily. Leave everything to me.
>> Lily: Oh, leave you to crash and burn into Rose's life? I don't think so. No. Unburden yourself, Simon. The truth shall set you free.
>> Simon: Well, the truth may set me free, Lily, but it will have the opposite effect on you.

Scene 5:
Scene: Lily Walsh Snyder's hotel room.

LILY WALSH SNYDER AND SIMON FRASIER

>> Simon: Come here. I won't bite. I want to show you something. Come here. You see, it all started with a beautiful face. Your beautiful face.
>> Lily: When we met?
>> Simon: Before I came to the states. Someone showed me a picture of a woman in a magazine. She was striking. See, if I've made one mistake, Lily, it was in underestimating you.
>> Lily: Underestimating me how?
>> Simon: I expected you to be naive, uncomplicated.
>> Lily: Sorry to disappoint you.
>> Simon: No. No, on the contrary. I have enjoyed the challenge. I mean, I nearly met my match, yeah? Nearly.

[Simon shoves Lily into the closet.]

>> Lily: Ow! Simon! Ow! Open this door!
>> Simon: No, no, sorry. No can do, love. You see, if anyone deserves answers, Lily, it's definitely you, but I'm not gonna give them to you.
>> Lily: Simon!
>> Simon: So make yourself very comfortable, Lily, 'cause you could be in there for awhile. Gotta run.
>> Lily: Simon! Open the door, Simon, Please! Oh, he's going after Rose!

Scene 6:
Location: Boardwalk Plaza Hotel
Scene: Rose D'Angelo's dressing room.

VOICE OF SIMON FRASIER

>> Simon: Thanks very much, mate.

SIMON FRAISER AND ROSE D'ANGELO

[Knock at door.]
>> Rose: Well, hello, gorgeous.
>> Simon: Hi there. Rose, isn't it?
>> Rose: Yeah, Rose. And you are --
>> Simon: Simon. Simon Frasier. I'm a very good friend of Lily Snyder's.
>> Rose: Simon. Yeah, Simon -- so where's Lily? She was supposed to meet me here.
>> Simon: Well, Lily sends apologies, but she got an emergency call from her husband and sent me in her place. And these are for you.
>> Rose: Huh. Why didn't she call me?
>> Simon: Oh, she's just busy dealing with this latest family crisis.
>> Rose: When's she comin'?
>> Simon: I'm not sure.
>> Rose: Well, thanks for the flowers, but I'm beat.
>> Simon: Lily warned you about me, didn't she?
>> Rose: Your name came up.
>> Simon: I can imagine. I can imagine. I can always tell suspicion in a beautiful woman's eyes.
>> Rose: Should I be? Suspicious, I mean?
>> Simon: You're a woman of the world, Rose.
>> Rose: Yes, I am.
>> Simon: You know that there are three sides to the story -- mine, hers and the truth.
>> Rose: So what do ya want?
>> Simon: I just want to clear up any misconceptions that Lily might have given you about me.
>> Rose: I like the way you talk.
>> Simon: I like the way you talk. And I gotta tell you, I was absolutely floored -- floored -- by your performance.
>> Rose: Yeah? Really? Well, most people just head for the one-arm bandits before we even get offstage.
>> Simon: Yeah, well, most people don't appreciate real talent.
>> Rose: You got that right. I gotta get out of my costume.
>> Simon: I'll turn my back.
>> Rose: I'll do it quickly. So, what's the real deal?
>> Simon: What do you mean?
>> Rose: Well, usually when someone shows up with flowers, they're after something.
>> Simon: Wow, you are very perceptive.
>> Rose: I get around.
>> Simon: Well, there's no point in putting anything over you. The truth is, yeah. Yeah, I am after something.
>> Rose: Something that I can provide?
>> Simon: You'd be surprised.
>> Rose: It's been a long time since I've been surprised, honey, so go on. Give it your best shot.

Scene 7:
Scene: Rose D'Angelo's dressing room.

SIMON FRAISER AND ROSE D'ANGELO

[Rose is behind a changing partition.]

>> Simon: And it was those beautiful love letters that led me to Lily.
>> Rose: So the old man never saw his gal again?
>> Simon: Never. Some say my great-grandfather died of a broken heart.
>> Rose: Wouldn't be the first time. I read a this book, "Love's Revenge." So good.
>> Simon: Rose, my family sent me here on this quest. The resemblance between you and Lily and my great-grandfather's lost love -- it's, well, it's kind of put us in the middle of a legal issue.
>> Rose: Hey -- hey, no, I've always been above board. I don't want any trouble with the law.
>> Simon: No, no, no, no, no. It's nothing like that, I assure you. It's just that we believe that there's a distinct chance that you may be related to us.
>> Rose: Ha! Related? Come on. Me from Jersey and you from the rich kangaroo side of the tracks? Please.
>> Simon: Rose, we think that a descendant of beloved's is due a portion of my great-grandfather's estate. And, which includes a sizable inheritance. But of course, Lily didn't mention that, did she? >> Rose: No. Is she tryin' to cut me out of the action?
>> Simon: Well, let's just say that Lily has her own selfish reasons for keeping us apart.
>> Rose: So why did you trail her here?
>> Simon: Well, I suspected that she'd found something new. So -- which she did. She discovered you. And obviously, she didn't want us to meet.
>> Rose: 'Cause she's after my dough?
>> Simon: When I left Oakdale, I had no idea that lily would actually lead me to the woman that I've been searching for. And when I saw you, Rose, I strongly felt that we were destined to meet.
>> Rose: Stop it. You've got my head spinnin'.
>> Simon: All I need is a little family information.
>> Rose: There isn't much to tell.
>> Simon: If you are the long, lost relative, I can finally, finally right an injustice that was done long ago.
>> Rose: That reminds me of another book. "The Princess and the Slave." Exactly the same. So good. Great, great book.
>> Simon: I haven't read it. Listen, Rose, you've got to take my word as a gentleman that everything I've told you is true. I mean, I am not a danger to you or to anyone, and I'm not here to con you, or to take your money.
>> Rose: Lucky you -- 'cause I ain't got any.
>> Simon: But I do need your help. And in return, it is possible that I can offer you not only a piece of our rich family history, but something far more tangible.

Scene 8:
Scene: Rose D'Angelo's dressing room.

SIMON FRASIER AND ROSE D'ANGELO

>> Rose: You think we're, like, cousins?
>> Simon: Perhaps.
>> Rose: Kissin' cousins?
>> Simon: Well, we're many times removed. So if we perchance were to kiss, it would be in no way incestuous. Wow. You look sensational.
>> Rose: Thank you.
>> Simon: I would love to discuss all this further. Do you want to go for a drink or cocktail or --
>> Rose: No. No, not tonight. My dogs are barkin'. I got a big kink in my back.
>> Simon: Listen, good, at least let me see you home.
>> Rose: Oh, the last guy that wanted to see me home claimed he was some rich Arab prince. The only oil I saw was in his hair.
>> Simon: Well, I can't imagine. Well, look, if your dogs are gonna be that much trouble, how about we just meet for breakfast?
>> Rose: Great, perfect.
>> Simon: Great. How about the hotel restaurant, around 8:00?
>> Rose: In the morning? No, no, try noon. I don't come alive until then.
>> Simon: All right, fine. Noon it is.
>> Rose: Great.
>> Simon: Excellent.
>> Rose: Okay.
>> Simon: Oh, yeah, Rose, if Lily contacts you, you'll just remember everything I said.
>> Rose: Don't worry. I've got Lily's number.
>> Simon: Okay. In the meantime, just jot down any genealogical information that you might remember.
>> Rose: What for? I am 100% healthy.
>> Simon: No, no, you misunder -- forget about it. Until tomorrow.
>> Rose: Uh-uh.

Scene 9:
Scene: Lily Walsh Snyder's hotel room.

LILY WALSH SNYDER (IN CLOSET) AND SIMON FRASIER (IN ROOM)

>> Lily: Oh, I'll kill him!

SIMON FRASIER RETURNS TO THE ROOM.

>> Lily: Simon?
>> Simon: Hey, hey. How you doing in there?
>> Lily: Simon?
>> Simon: I just had the most fantastic chat with Rose. Lily, she is remarkable.
>> Lily: What did you do? Please open the door. Please?
>> Simon: Lily, I would open the door, but I am afraid that you might just try and kill me. So what I'll do is, I'll call room service on the way out, they can rescue you.
>> Lily: You're chicken.
>> Simon: It's been wonderful knowing you, Lily. I only wish we could have parted friends. I'll catch you later.

[Simon Fraiser leaves the room.]

>> Lily: Simon? Simon! Simon! Don't! Open the door, please! Please let me out!

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May, 2000