EPISODE 6/4/02
Simon And Katie "Jog"

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June, 2002


TUESDAY, June 4, 2002

Scene 1:
Location: The Cottage

SIMON FRASIER, KATIE FRASIER

>> Simon: Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.
>> Katie: Sorry.
>> Simon: You don't touch.
>> Katie: I'll be gentle.
>> Simon: Ow, ow -- okay, you're doing that on purpose. No more for you.
>> Katie: Oh, really? You sure about that? You seem pretty insatiable for someone who was just shot.
>> Simon: I don't have a bullet in me. And you shot that lamp, which exploded, therefore sending shards of glass into my nether regions. There's a big difference.
>> Katie: Oh, yeah. Those nether regions. Still pretty tender, are they?
>> Simon: Yeah. Ow! -- Yeah, yes. So be gentle. Be nice.
>> Katie: Gentle.
>> Simon: Yes.
>> Katie: Fabulous. Oh, you know what? We should do no hands. That reminds me of Malta. I'm pretty good at no hands.
>> Simon: You sure are. No hands is good.
[ Phone rings ]
>> Katie: Let the machine get it.
>> Simon: No hands.
>> Machine: This is Katie and Simon's enchanted cottage. Leave a message.
>> Margo: Hi, guys, it's Margo. Listen, I thought you might like to know that Dahlia's been officially shipped back to Sacramento.
They're going for murder one. So even if dahlia pleads doubt, she's going to jail for the rest of her life, which means she's out of your lives forever this time, so celebrate. Go back to normal -- whatever normal is for you guys.
[ Simon grunts ]
>> Simon: Well, I guess that's that then. It's really over.
>> Katie: I guess.
>> Simon: Hey, baby, it's okay. Hey. It's all right.
>> Katie: I'm sorry. I didn't mean to break down like that.

Scene 2:
Location: The Cottage

SIMON FRASIER, KATIE FRASIER

>> Simon: No. We've both been holding so much in for so long. Do you realize the kind of pressure that we've been under, what Dahlia did? It almost broke us.
>> Katie: Don't say that. If this is gonna be the sum of our life together, careening from one possible tragedy to the next, I'm gonna have to go back to that nash rambler, hop on a plane to Tibet or something, because I can't live like this.
>> Simon: Me either.
>> Katie: Of course you can. You're a born adventurer.
>> Simon: The kinds of adventures that we've been having lately, you know, quite frankly, I can do without. I came too close to losing you, Katie. We should be learning all those incredible things that you -- that people learn about each other in the first year of marriage. We haven't even had a chance to enjoy our new home here.
>> Katie: I know. You're right. Something has to change. Oh, you know what? I was just reading in a magazine, there's this --
>> Simon: No, no, babe, just come here, come here, come here. Forget about the books, forget about the manuals. I don't want to learn about what a good marriage is from someone else. This is -- this is a do-it-yourself project. And I'm willing to give it everything I have got. How about you?

Scene 3:
Location: The Cottage

SIMON FRASIER, KATIE FRASIER

>> Simon: Okay, I mean, we're pretty smart people, and we -- we love each other, so it can't be too hard to get our marriage back on an even keel, right?
>> Katie: Right.
>> Simon: Yeah? I mean, we were extremely happy before Dahlia came along. Let's just get back to that.
>> Katie: I don't know if we can go backwards. We're different people now. I mean, look around us. We're in a completely different place. But it's ours. We have some money in the bank. All I want, really, is just to be your wife. I want you to know me inside and out. And I want to know you that way, too.
>> Simon: Yeah, you certainly don't know all the secrets I've got in my past.
>> Katie: I don't -- care.
>> Simon: You sure? I mean, when you have a husband with a past like mine, things are bound to pop up. I mean, you were pretty frightened by some of the things that Dahlia said. And who wouldn't be? My -- my history is hardly impeccable.
>> Katie: I know, but you're different now.
>> Simon: I am.
>> Katie: I know.
>> Simon: I don't blame you for having those few moments of doubt. I don't.
>> Katie: I'm sorry. I didn't want to.
>> Simon: I know, I know, I know.
>> Katie: How are we gonna keep those things out of our marriage? They're just people and blasts from the past.
>> Simon: I guess with the old-fashioned, time-honored ways, you know? Communication, trust -- lust.
>> Katie: What about love, pure and simple?
>> Simon: Our love is always gonna be there. But sometimes it's not enough by itself.
>> Katie: We found that out, didn't we? It's kind of scary.
>> Simon: Oh, yeah. Really loving someone as much as we do, it's about as scary as it gets. There's nothing safe about it.
>> Katie: If that's supposed to make me feel better, it didn't really work.
>> Simon: What I'm saying is that maybe we should just learn to accept what we can't control.
>> Katie: What do you mean?
>> Simon: Well, anything could happen at any -- any given moment, right? Instead of trying to manage the risk, maybe we should just learn to embrace it.
>> Katie: Yeah, that sounds great. But I don't know if I can. I don't know if I have the guts.

Scene 4:
Location: The Cottage

SIMON FRASIER, KATIE FRASIER

>> Simon: Okay, all I'm saying is, let's not do more and try harder. Let's -- let's do less and try easier.
>> Katie: All right, can we do that by just going upstairs, taking these upstairs and going to bed like normal married people?
>> Simon: No. We are going to celebrate the rebirth of our marriage right now.
>> Katie: No, no. Oh, hey, we've proven that we're good at this, and it doesn't solve anything. We've found out that we're human and our marriage is not indestructible.
>> Simon: Nothing is indestructible. We are the way we are, okay? And nothing's going to change that.
>> Katie: You've been reading too many of my self-help books.
>> Simon: Hey, hey, listen, listen. Okay, what's kept us together this whole time?
>> Katie: Me.
>> Simon: Yes. And, hey, some of me, too. And it has been an adventure, like you pointed out.
>> Katie: You're make me confused now, because I thought we decided we were sick of adventures.
>> Simon: I'm sick of the wrong kinds of adventures. Being Mr. And Mrs. Frasier, inseparable, brave and a little crazy, that's an adventure worth having. So, take your clothes off.
>> Katie: I just got finished telling you that that's not gonna solve our problems.
>> Simon: No, no, no. This is more of a bonding moment -- a bonding moment. We're going to celebrate freedom from Dahlia oppression, something to remember for the rest of our lives. This is a new beginning.
>> Katie: And what are we supposed to do?
>> Simon: We're going to go for a little stroll.
>> Katie: A stroll?
>> Simon: More of a jog, actually, to the highway and back.
>> Katie: You want to go jogging?
>> Simon: Mm-hmm. And we gotta be really quick about it.
>> Katie: Why?
>> Simon: Because we're gonna be naked.

Scene 5:
Location: The Cottage

SIMON FRASIER, KATIE FRASIER

>> Katie: Have you lost your mind?
>> Simon: Absolutely, a long time ago.
>> Katie: I am not doing that.
>> Simon: Come on. It's nothing we haven't seen before.
>> Katie: I'm concerned about the neighbors. I don't want them seeing anything bouncing other than my personality.
>> Simon: But we need to do something primal. Yeah. Something to wash away the last few months and remind us that we are really us. Come on, you owe me. I'm going to be carrying shrapnel around in me for the rest of my life because of you, so you're gonna do this.
>> Katie: Ah, those nether regions. But I did apologize for that.
>> Simon: Come on, baby, let's start living again!
>> Katie: Do we have to be naked? I mean, what are we trying to prove?
>> Simon: That -- that our marriage is alive because we have each other. And that is worth celebrating every single day of our life.
>> Katie: Okay. A trial by fire.
>> Simon: Mm-hmm.
>> Katie: Rebirth. Maybe you're right.
>> Simon: I know I'm right. So what do you say, my little moon bride, my forest nymph, my buddy in the buff?
>> Katie: Hmm. I don't know, Simon. I'm sorry.
>> Simon: Come on.
>> Katie: If this is what we have to do to make our marriage better, to start over, then -- I don't know. I'm just going to have to -- beat you to the highway and back!
[ Katie screams ]

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June, 2002