EPISODE 1/21/04
Simon Learns About Katie And Mike
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January, 2004
WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 21, 2004
Scene 1:
Location: Frasier Cottage
Scene: Bedroom
SIMON FRASIER, KATIE FRASIER, MIKE KASNOFF
[ Simon looking into the bedroom from the hallway sees Katie and Mike kissing. ]
>> Katie: I thought we were going back to the Lakeview.
>> Mike: After.
[Song, "It's Only Your Shadow Filling The Room" playing in background.]
Scene 2:
Location: Frasier Cottage
Scene: Bedroom
SIMON FRASIER, KATIE FRASIER, MIKE KASNOFF
[ Simon thinking ]
>> Simon: No, no, no, this can't be happening. I mean, she can't have forgotten all about me. No, no, that's it. She must have an angle. She's trying to get information from this guy or something. 'Cause -- I mean, she's not gonna sleep with him. She's still my wife.
>> Katie: Wait, stop.
[ Simon thinking ]
>> Simon: Yeah, well, it's about bloody time.
>> Katie: I have an incredible idea.
>> Mike: I got one or two myself. You wanna know what they are?
>> Katie: Mike, please, just listen. Listen.
>> Mike: What?
>> Katie: Remember Jack and Carly's wedding? How serene it was? How relaxed everyone was?
>> Mike: First time I saw Craig without a tie.
>> Katie: Well, that's what I want for our wedding, too.
[ Simon thinking ]
>> Simon: Oh, man, that's what happens when you don't sleep for a week. You start hearing things. 'Cause there is no way katie just said that. No bloody way. She could not be getting married.
>> Mike: Whatever you want's fine with me. I'm so happy you decided to be my wife. What?
>> Katie: I just heard something in the other room.
Scene 3:
Location: Frasier Cottage
Scene: Bedroom
SIMON FRASIER, KATIE FRASIER, MIKE KASNOFF, HENRY COLEMAN
>> Mike: Stay here. I'll go take a look.
>> Henry: Surprise!
>> Katie: Henry, don't you ever hear of knocking?
>> Henry: What? Oh, knocking is for strangers, Kate-ums. You and I are well beyond such pesky formalities.
>> Mike: I like those formalities. Next time, knock, Henry.
>> Katie: What are you doing here?
>> Henry: Well, I order a nice bottle of champagne for you guys and then the waiter told me that you weren't there at the suite. And I got, you know, a little worried something had happened, so I thought I'd come down here and, you know, find you.
>> Mike: Lucky us.
>> Katie: Well, we're fine.
>> Henry: Okay.
>> Katie: But that was very sweet of you to worry.
>> Henry: Okay. Well, what can I say? It's a side of myself I rarely show. But enough about that. Why don't you two get back to the suite and put that "do not disturb" sign to good use.
>> Katie: What do you think?
>> Mike: Let's do it. All right, don't follow us.
>> Henry: I won'T. Sorry, sorry. And, you know, lock your doors, okay? Because you don't know who might be lurking in the hallway. All right?
[Simon comes out of hiding ]
>> Simon: How could you let this happen, Henry? How could you let her get engaged on me?
Scene 4:
Location: Frasier Cottage
Scene: Bedroom
SIMON FRASIER, HENRY COLEMAN
>> Henry: It's not like you were away on a fishing trip, Simon. You were officially dead. As in dead.
>> Simon: There was no other way, Henry. If Katie knew I was alive, she'd have stayed in Australia and got herself killed.
>> Henry: Yeah, isn't that always how it is with guys like us? We sacrifice ourselves so that others may live and prosper.
>> Simon: I wanted Katie to live so I could be her husband again. I didn't expect her to go off and get married again so quickly.
>> Henry: Wait, Simon, she has been mourning you ever since you left her! And Mike has been -- Mike has been very patient. Very patient.
>> Simon: No, do not try to sell me on Katie's new lover. Okay? Man, I feel sick enough as it is.
>> Henry: I wouldn't dream of it. Do you have any idea of what you're gonna do about this?
>> Simon: Maybe it's better off if I just stay dead, huh?
>> Henry: The taxes are lower. You'd never have to write another birthday card. Hmm.
>> Simon: No way, no way. No, no, I cannot go without saying a word. I need her to understand. I need to explain everything. I heard them say they were staying at the Lakeview.
>> Henry: No, Simon -- don't.
Scene 5:
Location: Lakeview Towers Hotel
Scene: Lobby
SIMON FRASIER, KATIE FRASIER, MIKE KASNOFF
>> Mike: We're thinking about extending our stay. Is the suite available tomorrow, too?
>> Katie: Oh, please? I hope so. We're celebrating something. Something very wonderful. Oh, there's Nancy Hughes. I wanna go say hi.
>> Mike: Kiss me.
>> Katie: Mrs. Hughes, hi. How are you feeling?
>> Nancy: Katie, how nice to see you. Fine, but obviously not as fine as you.
>> Katie: What do you mean?
>> Nancy: You are glowing like a full-blown harvest moon. Is something going on that I should know about?
>> Katie: Well, we're not supposed to say anything just yet. But Mike Kasnoff and I are getting married.
>> Nancy: Oh, that's the most wonderful news. I wish you both a lifetime of happiness.
>> Mike: You told her about the engagement, didn't you?
>> Katie: Yeah, I did.
>> Nancy: Oh, I'll tell you -- congratulations, Mike. Your bride-to-be is a gem.
>> Katie: Oh, thank you.
>> Mike: I know. And I will devote my life to make her happy.
>> Nancy: Well, you couldn't ask for anything more than that. You two have made my day.
>> Katie: Oh, good.
[ Simon is sitting in the lobby, hiding behind a newspaper and overhears the conversation. ]
Scene 6:
Location: Lakeview Towers Hotel
Scene: Lobby
SIMON FRASIER, KATIE FRASIER, MIKE KASNOFF, HOTEL CLERK
[ Simon is sitting in the lobby, hiding behind a newspaper listening to Mike and Katie. ]
>> Mike: Tell me something. You think room service could send up a big bowl of strawberries with some melted chocolate?
>> Clerk: I will do what I can, sir.
>> Mike: Thank you.
>> Katie: Thanks.
>> Mike: Come on.
[ Mike and Katie head for the elevator, Simon following. ]
[ Elevator dings, Mike and Katie enter. ]
[Door closes, Katie sees Simon. ]
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January, 2004